​In relationships, like finances, there are deposits and withdrawals.  The balance of your emotional currency plays a significant role in shaping the dynamics of your relationships. Imagine that every interaction, every word, and every action have the potential to either deposit or withdraw emotional currency from our relationship bank account. Understanding and effectively managing these emotional transactions can make all the difference between a thriving, fulfilling relationship and one that feels drained and disconnected.  This is a reality in both life and in leadership.

Emotional deposits act as the building blocks of a strong and resilient relationship. They are the positive interactions, gestures, and expressions of kindness and appreciation that create a foundation of trust, and connection. 

Just as deposits can strengthen relationships, emotional withdrawals can deplete emotional reserves. These withdrawals occur when negative interactions erode trust, respect, and emotional well-being.
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I have heard statistics that say it takes 7 emotional deposits to balance out 1 negative, whether that is true or not, it brings up the point that intention needs to be put into being sure there is at least a balance. 

What does your emotional currency look like in life and in leadership?
 
B.

In modern day leadership, the concept of Emotional Intelligence (EQ) has gained increasing traction as we slowly see older leadership models fade away. I often refer to this as Modern Day Leadership.  EQ is a person's ability to recognize, understand and manage their own emotions, as well as those of others. Unlike traditional measures of intelligence, EQ emphasizes the importance of interpersonal skills in personal and professional success.   

How does EQ show up in leadership?  I believe there are a few key components that make EQ in leadership powerful!

Self-awareness is a key component of EQ. Leaders with high levels of self-awareness are able to understand their own strengths and weaknesses, and how they impact others. This allows one to lead with empathy, compassion and authenticity. By being aware of your own emotional triggers, you can control reactions in difficult situations and make better decisions. This ability to remain calm and composed under pressure is a hallmark of a great leader.
 
Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. Leaders with high EQ are able to connect with their team members on a personal level, which helps to build trust and foster a positive work culture. They are able to communicate effectively with individuals from diverse backgrounds and with different personalities, making them more effective at managing teams and resolving conflicts.
 
Adaptability, the ability to flex and flow, in today's fast-paced business environment, the ability to adapt to changing circumstances is critical. Leaders with high EQ are able to navigate uncertainty and change with ease. When you are open to new ideas and are willing to change course when necessary. This ability to be flexible and adaptable is essential for driving innovation and staying ahead of the competition.
 
Leaders with high EQ are often highly motivated and driven with clear vision of their goals and are able to inspire and motivate their team members to work towards them. When you create a positive work environment where team members feel valued and supported it leads to higher levels of engagement, job satisfaction and productivity.
 
Communication, community & culture are other important components of leaders with high EQ.  Leaders who are able to communicate effectively, build strong relationships and influence others cultuvate a more in depth, happier team. Leaders who a high EQ are skilled at networking, negotiating and resolving conflicts, this ability to collaborate and work effectively with others is essential for achieving organizational goals.

EQ is an increasing critical component of effective leadership and one of my passions has quickly become modern day leadership. It allows leaders to understand themselves and others, build strong relationships, adapt to changing circumstances, and motivate their teams to achieve their goals.

B.

In life, we all face countless decisions that shape our present and future. But have you ever felt lost, indecisive, or unsure of the right choice? One way to overcome this is by having a clear understanding of our personal core values. Getting quiet with yourself and digging deep to determine personal core values can guide us towards congruent decision-making. 

My personal core values are: Freedom, Integrity, Growth, Authenticity, Impact, Connection, Passion & Creation.  More words than I’d ideally like, to be honest, but when I look to pare them down – I have a hard time identifying which to put any on the chopping block.

Personal core values are the fundamental beliefs and principles that guide our behavior and decisions. They represent what we stand for and what is important to us as individuals. These values are unique to each person and are shaped by our upbringing, experiences, culture, and personal beliefs. 

Personal core values act as a compass, helping us navigate through life's challenges and opportunities. When we are clear on our values, we can make decisions that align with our beliefs, and this creates a sense of inner peace and fulfillment. It also enables us to prioritize our time and energy towards the things that truly matter to us.

When we face a decision, we can ask ourselves whether it aligns with our values. In other words, your personal core values can act at a litmus test of sorts.  If it does, we can move forward with confidence, knowing that we are acting in accordance with our beliefs. If it doesn't, we can choose to pass on the opportunity or find a way to reconcile it with our values.  Having defined personal core values helps to avoid integrity pain. 

In conclusion, personal core values play a crucial role in guiding congruent decision-making. By understanding our values, we can make decisions that align with our beliefs, stay true to ourselves, prioritize our time and energy, and build authentic relationships with others.

They say, if you don’t stand for something, you will fall for anything.  So, take some time to reflect on your personal core values and see how they can guide you in decision making. 

B.

 
In my opinion Core Values are essential for any organization.  It sums up your company personality, priorities and therefore company culture.  I believe core values need to be limited, I have seen some companies have a long list of core values and it tells me they have not boiled down who they are quite yet.  Talking about your core values often with your team is important.  Having your team see you, as a leader, make decisions based on your Core Values instills trust and buy-in.  Defined core values attracts the right people, it keeps the right fits…and equally important, when you stick to your values and don’t compromise, it weeds out the bad fits!  It’s almost like strong defined core values that therefore create a specific culture, spit the wrong people out of its mouth. 

Aspire has 4 Core Values:  Team, Growth, Raving Fans & Innovation.
 
Innovation:
Innovation is the driving force behind progress and growth. Prioritizing innovation helps us to create products and services that meet the changing needs in the marketplace. Innovation also helps us stay ahead of our competitors by coming up with new ideas and technologies. Innovation helps us stay relevant in the market.
To foster innovation, we encourage experimentation and creativity. We stay open to new ideas and are willing to invest in research and development. We empower employees to take ownership of their work and provide them with the resources and support they need to pursue innovative projects.
 
Team:
The success of any organization depends on the strength of its team. A strong team is made up of individuals who work together towards a common goal, complement each other's skills, and share the same values. By working together, teams can accomplish more than any individual could on their own.
To build a strong team, we prioritize collaboration, communication, and helping each other. We foster a culture vulnerability and servanthood leadership, where we rise by lifting each other. Leaders should also provide their teams with the tools and resources they need to succeed, including training, mentorship, and consistent feedback.
 
Raving fans:
Raving fans are customers so satisfied they become advocates for the brand. These fans are not only loyal customers, but they also refer new customers and promote the company through word of mouth and social media. This is how Aspire has been built, one raving fan at a time – referral based. 
We prioritize customer satisfaction and provide an exceptional customer experience. We respond to customer inquiries and feedback promptly and go above and beyond to exceed customer expectations.  We train, measure, and reflect to continually grow in this area.
 
Growth:
We prioritize QUALITY growth but most importantly we are focused on personal and professional development for each team member, the more we grow ourselves, the more we will grow Aspire.  
We have plans for 1, 3 and 5 years forward so we know what we are working for as a company and individually. Leaders should provide their teams with a clear vision for the future and the resources and support they need to achieve their goals.
 
If you don’t have your business core values nailed down, I encourage you to grab your team and start with a brain dump with your team…having your team involved in the process makes it more meaningful!  
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Cheers, Beth 

In both our personal and professional lives, our values play a critical role in shaping who we are, what we stand for, and how we make decisions. Core values are principles or beliefs that guide our behavior and decision-making, and they are essential for individuals and organizations alike. This blog I will set the stage of the importance of our personal and professional values, and the following weeks I will go into detail as to what my core values are personally and maybe even more importantly, how I nailed them down.  

Personal Core Values:
Personal core values are beliefs and principles that define who we are as individuals. They are unique to each person and are shaped by our upbringing, experiences, culture, among many other things. Personal core values are a compass that helps us navigate our lives, make important decisions, and stay true to ourselves.  Personal core values take time to identify, and a lot of self-reflection and awareness.

Living a life aligned with our core values can help us feel more fulfilled. It can also provide a sense of purpose and direction in life, as it can serve as a litmus test of sorts.

Personal core values also help us set boundaries and make decisions. For example, if you value health, you might prioritize regular exercise and healthy eating habits over other activities.

Business Core Values:
In the same way that personal core values guide our individual behavior, business core values guide the behavior of organizations. Business core values are the principles and beliefs that shape an organization's culture, decision-making, and relationships with stakeholders.  I am a strong believer that a business should have as few core values as possible, I have seen some businesses with so many core values it would be impossible for a team member to remember and apply them all. 

Business core values are important because they help establish a company's identity and purpose. They can also help attract and retain employees who share those values. For example, if a company values innovation, it might prioritize investing in research and development and encourage employees to think outside the box.
Business core values can also impact how a company interacts with its customers and stakeholders. For example, if a company values social responsibility, it might prioritize giving back to the community through charitable initiatives.

The Importance of Aligning Personal and Business Core Values:
While personal and business core values may seem like two separate entities, they are closely interconnected. When an individual's personal values align with a company's core values, they are more likely to feel fulfilled and motivated in their work. Conversely, when an individual's personal values conflict with a company's values, it can lead to a sense of dissonance and dissatisfaction.  If your company culture is strong, it can also weed out those team members that are not a right fit – they will be able to self-identify the misalignment.   

Additionally, when a company's core values align with its employees' personal values, it can lead to a more cohesive and productive work environment. Shared values can help build a sense of community and purpose among employees, leading to increased collaboration and innovation.  Values should also be revisited every so often as over time they can evolve. 

In conclusion, both personal and business core values are essential for individuals and organizations. Personal core values help guide our behavior and decision-making, while business core values establish an organization's culture and purpose. When personal and business core values align, it can lead to a more fulfilling and productive life and work environment. Therefore, it's important to identify and prioritize our core values and seek out opportunities that align with them. 

With love, B

As our modern world becomes increasingly fast-paced and demanding, many people strive for work-life balance as the ultimate goal. Work-life balance suggests that one's life should be divided equally between work and personal pursuits. However, I think the idea is more damaging that helpful - heck, even just to walk you need to get out of balance.  Which leads me to believe that in order to move forward, life often needs to be out of balance for a season.  Hear me out...
The notion of work-life balance implies that work and life are two separate entities that should be given equal attention. This is problematic, work and life are often interconnected, and each can affect the other. For example, if someone is experiencing stress and dissatisfaction at work, it can impact their personal life and vice versa. Trying to compartmentalize these two aspects of life can create unnecessary stress and pressure.
Secondly, the concept of work-life balance can be difficult to achieve, especially for those who are starting a new career, a new chapter in life, a new start up business, and the list goes on. It can create an unrealistic expectation that people should be able to achieve perfect balance, and it's simply not true. This can lead to feelings of failure and guilt when balance is not achieved, which can negatively impact mental health and wellbeing.
Thirdly, the idea of work-life balance often suggests that personal pursuits are less important than work. This can lead to people neglecting their personal needs and passions in favor of work, which can lead to burnout and a lack of fulfillment. Instead, we should focus on work-life harmony (as Grant Botma's book implies), which recognizes that work and personal life are intertwined and can coexist in a more harmonious way.
Finally, the concept of work-life balance tends to overlook the fact that work can bring a sense of purpose and fulfillment to one's life. Work can provide opportunities for personal growth, social interaction, and a sense of achievement. Rather than striving for a strict balance between work and personal life, we should focus on finding meaning and satisfaction in both.
The idea of work-life balance may seem like a noble goal, but I think it does us a dis-service. Instead, we should aim for work-life harmony and recognize that life will bring different seasons and the harmony will look differently with each one.  Work and personal life are interconnected and can coexist in a more harmonious way. By finding meaning and fulfillment in both aspects of life, we can create a more fulfilling existence.

Food for thought! 
​Beth 

​There is that saying – If you say you can or you can’t, you’re right!   I think there is a lot of truth to it. One thing that I am convicted of is what we say with our mouth, we hear with our ears, I believe it is powerful combination.  I believe that “I can’t” has turned into a default, passive language, catch all, lazy talk and we need to become more intentional with our thought and our language both.

The main reason this phrase bothers me is because it’s limiting and gives the impression that we don’t have a choice, and we do.   Let’s irradicate verbiage that would indicate we are not in control; I know it’s not intentional but at the end it’s limiting.    We all have 24 hours in the day, and the reality is that we make time for the things that are important. 

The swap I love for “I can’t” is – this is not a priority for me at this moment or, this does not fit into my current goals.   I realize that “I can’t” can also apply to many other area, even when it comes to something as simple as a schedule, if there is a conflict you could say – I have a schedule conflict at that time, would xyz time work for you? 
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My point is, put more thought into the words used, and my personal goal is to irradicate as much verbiage as I can that doesn’t serve me.  I am not perfect at it, in fact, my ultimate phrase I loathe “busy” one of my team members caught me saying this week!  The point is progress and intention. 

In closing, you CAN!
Beth 

A few years ago I was on the phone with someone and they made a seemingly innocent comment, she said that she didn’t like it when a particular person said “I’m sorry you felt that way”…she went on to say that that particular person “made” her feel a certain way and their apology didn’t acknowledge what they made her feel.   I felt like I had an out of body experience in that moment, I remember reflecting on the conversation afterwards as it exposed some real stinkin’ thinking which caused me to do some reflection.   Whenever I have an a ’ha moment like this, my first sense is to check myself…do I do that?  I will often ask those around me that are close for feedback to make sure I myself am not doing the things that I identify.

Let me unpack my three main take aways after that eye opening conversation:

First, can we all just commit to taking ownership over our own emotional landscape please! People can and likely will at times in our lives attempt to make us feel all kinds of ways, but it’s our job to set healthy boundaries and to protect our own mind and heart.  Someone can’t make you feel anything, YOU are the one who gets to choose.

Second, we can’t assume someone’s intent.  Many times, we take a statement or situation and when we don’t have enough information, we tend to twist the meaning to be something negative and something about ourselves.  I can’t tell you how many times in my life I have seen assumptions be wrong, I have seen assumptions become very destructive in many relationships.  I work hard to make no assumptions, instead I will ask more questions and, in the meantime, I make a conscious choice to assume the positive.

Third, it’s not about me/you!   One of the most freeing things I remind myself of, if someone is acting rude, they treat me poorly or are ‘trying’ to make me feel bad… it is a reflection of them, not me.  When I keep this in mind, it also makes things less personal and it’s easier to manage emotions.

Something empowering happens when you start to guard your heart and mind, you see things in a different light…things feel less personal and you find that you don’t allow yourself to sit in spaces that pull you down.  Honestly, it’s even Biblical – “Protect your heart because all things flow from it” and “Take every thought captive.” 
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Food for thought, Beth 

A little heads up on this topic, it’s a soap box for me.  Likely because I have been on both sides of this coin and it’s something that I care a lot about for the people around me. I am going to speak to an overreaching theme I see in our society that I think many participate in subconsciously. I also want to acknowledge that we are all in different seasons of life with a variety of different demands, I don’t know yours.  Please know I am not coming from a critical heart; and I am also not going to mince words.  

I believe it becomes a quality-of-life issue when we choose to be chronically busy, in my opinion. I think for many of us, it’s time to press pause and do some serious evaluating.    I simply ask that you hold some space to consider if this may be an area you may want to examine.

In our society, many wear “busy” as a badge of honor, like somehow a lack of leisure time is now perceived as a status symbol. 

I see it differently, busy tells me that you are time-poor and unavailable.  Busy tells me that you don’t take control of your days, the day controls you.   Busy tells me you need to work on your time management.  Busy tells me that you have a lack of boundaries.  Busy tells me that you are not clear on your priorities.  Busy to me is a symptom of something deeper that needs to be addressed.  Being busy leads to life a life of obligation rather than of enjoyment, soon the things you love to do start to feel like an energy suck.  You deserve more than busy! 

How do we stop the madness?  Get to the root of the cause, I think it can be different for each person but here are some questions to reflect on…
Do you need to start to plan your weeks/ days ahead of time?
Do you need better habits/ systems?
Do you need to get clear on what your core objectives are?
Do you need to start to say NO or set better boundaries?
Are you leading a loud life to avoid the quiet for some other deeper reason? 
Do you need to delegate or ask for help?
Do you need to hire someone to help you?
Do I need to be more proactive rather than reactive?

Now, let me tell you, I know about heavy seasons in life.  Starting an insurance agency from scratch was no small feat, it took a lot of dedication and time and commitment.  Or when I had my kiddos’ 16 months apart…another demanding season.  Those seasons will happen, my point is that ‘busy’ should not be your life theme and in seasons of heavy pour, I encourage to be very intentional with your boundaries.  When I am going through intense seasons, my life becomes a lot smaller, I focus on keeping the main things, the main things. 

Leaders build slack in their day.  One area in my Sunday Sit-down I have shared in the past, after I plan my week, I look to delegate or delete…this is to help make sure I am building slack in my days.  I schedule my leisure first!  We are MORE productive when we are not overscheduled. 

Let’s swap busy!  Here are some alternative words I use because the word ‘busy’ just does not sit right.  I will use…
I have an abundant week!
This will be a fruitful day for me!
Today is full of opportunity!
 
I hope you start to build some leisure into your day and seriously reflect on if you partake in 'busy' culture.  Building leisure into my schedule is one of the best gifts I have given myself!
Cheers, Beth 

I have been in a new coaching program for the last 8 months, it’s focused on lifestyle and personal growth and also has a trickle down effect into business.  I have been really enjoying what I am learning, especially since this coach fits my mindset and style so nicely.

One aspect that I have worked on a lot is…thoughts become things and that our thoughts create our emotions, and we ARE in control of both of those things.  More on this later.

Tying into the above, is taking control of the words that come out of our mouths.  Even when talking with my kids, when I hear a statement they repeat to themselves, I have stopped them and said…not only are you saying that with your mouth, but your ears are hearing what you say.  THAT IS POWERFUL. 

What we say with our mouth, we hear with our ears.  It’s like a double whammy. 

While I would catch my kids in this area, I hadn’t stopped to check myself until maybe about a year ago, and then with much more intention once I started in this coaching program.  This sense check led me to ban some common phrases in my vocabulary all together.  I wanted to share what those statements are. 

In the next couple weeks, I will focus on a statement each week, I’ll go a little more in depth by unpacking what the hidden meaning had been and how changing the verbiage impacts moving forward.
 
Banned Statements….
“I’m (so) busy!”
“I can’t…”
“Made me feel…”
“Work life balance…”
 
These are some pretty common statements, ones we hear often in our daily lives and I bet many say not even thinking about it, like I always had. 
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This week, practice listening to the words that come out of your mouth.  Do you have phrases that you seem to repeat often?  Next week, we will unpack “I’m so busy.”
 
Cheers, Beth